The following message was sent to me by my (non-linguist) colleague Bob
("The Iowan") Palmer (rlp@antnov1.auckland.ac.nz). I thought it
might amuse those interested in speech act theory
Regards,
Simon Corston, shc@antnov1.auckland.ac.nz
************************
THE WEATHER
During your visit to the rural midwest, there is no safer subject to begin
a conversation with a stranger than what mother nature is doing at the moment.
Despite its security, weather conversations can be ice breakers or ice makers,
depending on your command of the vernacular and the time of year your conversation
takes place. If you are visiting in January and attempt to begin a conversation
by saying, "Man, it's cold here.", you are guaranteeing yourself
a very brief, dead end conversation that will leave you feeling colder than
you already are. The common response to this approach by a local to an outsider
is, "It sure is." and then walk away. As simple and sure as this
approach may seem to the visitor, it sends all the wrong signals to the
local host. In the eyes and mind of the rural midwesterner, the "Man,
its cold here." comment is telling him something that he already knows.
Three months before you arrived, almost everyone over the age of 55 packed
up the Impala and escaped to warmer weather in Arizona, Florida and south
Texas. Since their departure, they have been sending postcards reminding
your host of where they are, and he's not. Also, this comment lowers the
locals respect for your opinion and expectations he may have had for you.
"It sure is." is not the simple retort it may seem. The words
are few, but the message is much more complex than greets the numbed senses
of the outsider. In verbally saying "It sure is.", the message
meant to be conveyed, if it was expressed verbally, would more likely than
not be, "I KNOW ITS COLD! DO I LOOK STUPID, OR DID YOU SLEEP THROUGH
ALL OF YOUR GEOGRAPHY CLASSES THAT EXPLAINED DURING THE WINTER, THE FURTHER
NORTH YOU GO, THE COLDER IT GETS? WHAT IN THE WORLD DID YOU EXPECT, KEY
WEST?!" There are several reasons why this is not often expressed verbally.
During the winter, midwesterners are generally, as a group, much more introverted
than, say Texans for example. This is not due to a shortcoming in socialization
or sophistication, rather it is an attempt to save energy so as it can be
put to good use later, when it is needed most.
In evaluating responses to questions that deal with a socially complex situation,
such as the weather, it is always safe to assume that the reason for the
elicited response may not be what it seems. Another quite plausible reason
for the, "It sure is." followed by the persons departure may have
been that you reminded him that it is cold, that he's cold and it's time
to go inside and get warmed up.
BEGINNING A CONVERSATION:THE VERNACULAR
Before one can truly enjoy the fruits of a successful weather conversation,
the foundations for talking intelligently on such a vital subject must first
be laid. This groundwork is the vernacular, or terms that are used in conversation.
The use of these terms vary from area to area in the midwest, but the differences
are recognized by all as being a variation off the general midwestern weather
theme. Thus, it is better to familiarize yourself to one areas quirks than
to try and learn them all. Learning them all guarantees you an outsiders
status because no one is supposed to know exactly what you are talking about
all the time.
The version that is provided here is "Upper-west-of-the- Mississippi-south-of-the-twin-cities-north-of-the-quad-cities
version. Again, local versions of this dialect exist, however for the average
beginner, these differences will be mostly undetectable.
WEATHER TERMS: A LITTLE HISTORY
Spittin' Snow
There are several key phrases and terms that are commonly used, rephrased,
and used again in different contexts. It is most important to always use
the correct term in the correct context. For example: Oftentimes during
late fall and early winter, mother nature provides us with a condition of
light, intermittent wet snowfall that is never too awful abundant. When
this condition exists, it is said to be "spitting, or spittin' snow".
Spitting snow is a relatively new term, not appearing in the midwestern
weather vernacular until the early 1920's. Its appearance coincided with
the arrival of the automobile, which suggests the term may be derived by
metaphor as a result of how this type of snow appears on the autos windshield.
When this term became popular, another, older term for the same condition
- "chippin' snow" fell out of use. In using this term, it would
be correct say, "I don't mind driving when it's just spittin' a little,
but you won't see me out there if it gets any worse." Spitting is a
term that is to only be used when discussing snow. The worst context that
you could use this term in however would be during a light shower in the
middle of spring or summer. If you were to say for example, "Boy I
hope this spittin' shower will be enough to settle the dust (We'll get to
that term later)." You would probably be slapped if you were in the
presence of a lady for imagining, let alone saying, something that vulgar.
In the springtime when this same condition exists, it no longer is spitting
snow, rather it is "trying to rain." To use "spittin' snow"
in April or May is paramount to "Spittin' rain", which, as you
know, is wholly unacceptable. The reason behind this very significant difference
is in timing. No one in April or May wants anything more to do with winter,
and you are putting yourself at risk by even suggesting that there may be
another blizzard just around the corner.
Raining cats and dogs
One of the most popular ways of describing a heavy spring, summer, or fall
rainfall is its "raining cats and dogs". It does not, of course
actually rain cats and dogs. However, this term appears to have been derived
out of incident that took place during the summer of 1922 in Watapama Iowa.
Watapama (don't bother to look for it on a map, it's no longer there), located
on picturesque Lake Olie (it's not there anymore either), was caught in
the center of some climatological catastrophe (that's why neither one still
exist - you can't even find the spot on the map where they used to be).
Eyewitness reports say that Watapama and Lake Olie were pulled off the planet
in some "really strong updraft". For several weeks after this
natural catastrophe, much of the upper midwest experienced rainfall that
contained bits and pieces of Watapama, cars, tin cups, cows and of course,
dogs and cats. Leland Anderson of Sodom Gomorrah was, according to local
legend, the first person to use the phrase "raining cats and dogs",
after three rat terriers and five siamese cats rained down on his potato
and carrot garden. There are actually several different stories revolving
around where the term "raining cats and dogs" comes from, however
this seems to be the most credible one available.
If during your visit to the midwest a discussion comes up debating the origins
of this term, it is best to avoid partaking in this conversation, unless
you are well versed in the version that you find to be the most credible,
and are willing to go to fisticuffs to support your statements.